PMS or Positive Pregnancy Test?

Yeeeeeeeep, that's me the last few days. I don't even know how the 'dude' hasn't either A. Murdered me, B. Burned me at the stake, or C. Just plain kicked my ass out in the frecking cold. Oh I know why. It's because I'm hawt. Srsly, I'm pretty good looking. It's sad that my cartoon stick figures don't do me justice, but I've been pulled over by the cops for a P.C. If you don't know what that means, I'll help ya out. A P.C. is called a pussy check, means the dudes in blue pulled me over to check me out. (remind me to tell you the story later)

I have been one big azz beeeyotch. Some demon has taken a hold of my insides and decided to camp out. I can't even stand myself. I've eaten my weight in chocolate. Chocolate fudge cupcakes, Reese's peanut butter eggs, twix, and I've taken to hiding pop tarts in my purse...Seriously, what in thee fuck?! How bad is it? The 'dude' has gone hiking twice this weekend. It's 9F degrees out. *deadpan face* Poor guy. I might also mention I did this to him.

Soooo anyalmostcutyourfaceoff, he doesn't hate me (YET) and for that I love him.  I wish Aunt Flo would just arrive so I could get off this roller coaster of hell and so this isn't the case.



Relax, that isn't mine and hopefully won't be. Still have a few days to figure it out. Either the red dam breaks loose or our life breaks loose.  We don't want anymore child of the corns running around 'round here. I highly doubt there's an alien in my womb but it's possible.  *Rant* Why are PMS symptoms and possible pregnancy symptoms almost exactly alike?!!! Are they trying to kill me?  I think as soon as your egg is penetrated, alarm bells, whistles, and lights should go off. !!Warning Warning: You Are Pregnant!! None of this wait weeks bullcripe.

It's got this girl wanting to whip out a magnifying glass and check the toilet paper for traces of blood. I'm like CSI up in there. For realz.

So that's my weekend in a nutshell. Hope you had a good one and it didn't involve pregnancy scares or blood!!!